"I'm a big fan of money. I like it, I use it, I have a little. I keep it in a jar on top of my refrigerator. I'd like to put more in that jar."
Aubrey: I had a dream last night.
Nathan: What was it about?
Aubrey: Equity.
Nathan: Equity? Like......equity?
Aubrey: Yes. Weird, right? I didn't know I could dream about something so abstract.
Nathan: Wow. You are obsessed with money.
Aubrey: Yeah....I guess it turns me on.
Nathan laughs and then starts cuddling me and tickling my arm.
He leans in very close and starts
whispering
sweet
nothings
in my ear.
*
*
*
*
*
"Amortization....Stock options....401k....FICO score..."
I'm giggling like crazy so he continues in a very breathy voice, "...30 Year Fixed Conventional Loan....Roth IRA.....{short pause}....Suze Orman."
Aubrey: What?! Suze Orman?
Nathan: I couldn't think of anymore financial terms to say, and then I thought of her.
P.S. I'm not really obsessed with money so please don't contact me with any MLM schemes or info on how I can "make $10k my first month." Because, really? If you are making $10k a month, then why are you walking around in the afternoon heat putting fliers on every car in the Wal*Mart parking lot?
11 comments:
Okay, I must start every comment with 'ahahahaha!' cuz you're always sooo funny! that 'why are you passing out fliers' comment is sooo true--and made me laugh! Oh, and from what I've heard of Suze Orman, she's not exactly who you want to think of in romantic terms...though I hear she might think of you (not Nate) that way! =)
Gooooh-rOSS!!! I can't take anymore of your explicit love chatter! ha ha ha! & You can try to hide it but you will always be cheating on Nate with the green Brothers Mr.Benjamin & Hamilton $!$
JK That is too funny though!
Nate now brings up other women when you are in bed that can't be a good sign.
I'm with the Texas twins, my comments should all have a default of "HA HA HA"... Seriously!
And mentioning Suze Orman was the right category, but wrong moment. Good thing she's not hot or he'd of been in TROUBLE! But kudos to him for even thinking of all those money lingos... You must take awhile to get all revved up. HA HA HA.
And a big AMEN about the window shieled flyers! Oh, Aubrey, you are HILARIOUS!!!
P.S. I am glad it was an orange can and not peaches... I think those are bigger. ;0)
I guess What ever Turns you on right?? But be careful, that kind of talk can lead to more babies! ;)
hahahah....the romance of MONEY!! nothing else comes close. :) ahahah...you CRACK me up...and the vivid descriptions...it's like I felt your whispering breath while reading!! eeee!!! (little weird). hilarious. :)
You are too funny!!!! love you guys.
That sounds like something Phil would do! Nate is so werid-but you just have to love him!
Haha, that's hilarious! You guys are too funny! This is why I love reading your blog!
Ahhhh, the allure of "Dirty, Sexy Money". I love your writing style....so descriptive & full of humor.
HaHA so true...besides, if someone was really making $30K a month....I would think they would want to keep it a secret instead of writing on the back windo of their car!
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